When I was a little girl I begged my mother to get me a training bra. All the other girls were wearing them. I wanted one too. I'm still not quite sure what we were all in training for, but a training bra was a must have.
I remember finally getting one. It was a 32AA. It was white, with adjustable straps, and had absolutely flat cups. That's OK because I was absolutely flat as well. I was so proud of it. I wore it the minute we got home from the store under my absolutely positively spanky bright yellow jumpsuit. (OK, it was somewhere around 1968, cut me some slack here.)
The thing is, I was absolutely flat, as I mentioned, so there was nothing to actually hold the bra in place. So, whenever I lifted my arms over my head, the bra rode up and ended up somewhere under my armpits.
Thank goodness that spanky yellow jumpsuit zipped up the front, because I was then able to unzip the jumpsuit and pull the bra back down to where it was supposed to be. Down to cover my wanna-be breasts.
Then came the 70's and while I finally developed enough to actually hold a bra in place, we were all about burning our bras. So off went the bra. And now my mother wanted me to put one on because she was certain my perky little plums would start sagging.
Fast forward to the 80's and Madonna when underwear became outwear and I was all about black lacy things that were minimally supportive, but that was OK because there still wasn't all that much to support.
Now we're well into the new millennium, I'm 45 years old, and nursed a baby for a year. Let's just say that support is no longer optional, lest I care to give myself a black eye.
But, yes, now I'm 45 and I have an 8 year old daughter. An 8 year old daughter whose new best friend is 10 and let's just say, slightly more developed than my daughter is. This in no way suggests that the new best friend has any use for a bra either, but like me at 10, I'm sure she talked her mother into getting her one.
Zoe returned from a sleep over at her friend's house on Saturday morning. And as well all know the term sleep over is a gross misnomer as no sleep actually happens, so she tucked in for a little nap Saturday afternoon. I went to check on her and adjust the covers and noticed something that looked alarmingly bra-like on my daughter. On my baby who was so tired she needed to take a nap in my bed and had fallen asleep watching Mickey Mouse.
She rolled over and I saw it. My baby was wearing a training bra. My baby who makes an ironing board look full-figured was wearing the same sort of contraption I had worn nearly 30 years ago. I asked her where it came from and she told me that her friend had given it to her.
Part of me wanted to laugh. Another part of me was sad because I didn't take her to get her first bra. And yet another part of me wanted to ask her if her bra rides up when she lifts her arms like mine did.
Posted by beth at November 21, 2004 08:49 PMAwesome story!
Posted by: Lujza at November 22, 2004 12:41 AM8? 8?!! I think I was maybe 13 when I got mine. They grow up before we know it, don't they.
Posted by: Sie at November 22, 2004 04:56 AMReally wonderful post, Beth! On SOOOO many levels could I relate to your story. On at least two levels I am wondering if my dear husband sent me over to your post because he too zeroed in on 1) the whole flat-as-an-ironing board thing (truly frightening how well I can relate to THAT!), and because 2) having finished nursing 2 kids for 1+ years each, and am now entering the 2nd year of nursing with child number 3 – to say that support is no longer optional is almost laughably funny.
We haven't yet had the issue over the training-bra with Ari, but I did have a wistful moment when – after she finished reading "Are You There G-d, It's Me Margaret" and I asked her if she had any questions, she informed me that she "knew it all" already.
Sniff! How DO we hang onto our babies? They grow up SO fast!
Posted by: zahava at November 22, 2004 11:07 AMBrings back memories--my oldest begged for her first bra--we started with a sports bra frr her--she did not need it--now that she has to wear on she hates them--
Posted by: Cathy at November 22, 2004 07:47 PMTraining bras nothing. Just you wait until your girly starts clamoring for (deep breath now) thongs.
Posted by: GraceD at November 22, 2004 10:02 PMBeth, beautiful entry. Reminds me of my own struggles with developing at the ripe age of ten. Unfortunately I never had a training bra. Just as well, I was never that eager to get one.
GraceD, while I know that Beth is perfectly capable of shuddering at the thought of her baby clamoring for a...thong (it was so hard to type that), I couldn't help but shudder on her behalf.
Please don't tell me little girls are actually asking for thong underwear. That is so many levels of wrong I lost count.
Posted by: Carol at November 23, 2004 05:38 PMI am very sorry to inform mothers within broadcast reach of Beth's fine site that yes, middle school girls are requesting thongs. For VPL. From Victoria's Secret. Did I give in? Yes. But I pick my battles and for now we are waging the war for academic improvement.
Again,I apologize for being the one to break this to everyone. You'll thank me in time.
Posted by: GraceD at November 23, 2004 06:18 PMI'm here to tell you, the thought of a thong request didn't freak me out all that much....as someone who strikes back against VPL at all costs, I consider them a fashion must.
This is not to say that I am in any way ready for this request, I'm just saying, I could understand where it's coming from.
Posted by: beth at November 23, 2004 06:42 PMY'all want to shudder?
I'll give Zoe one of my thongs.
Posted by: Chuck at November 24, 2004 03:49 AMAh, this brought back painful memories of being measured in the lingerie dept of Ogilvies with my mother watching (and I didn't like my mother in those days). What's creepy about being 12 and having a flat chest is realizing your nipples are changing. So the training bra is useful for covering up some growth areas that must never be seen by boyz one's own age. *cough* (I seriously loathed puberty)
Posted by: Lesley at November 24, 2004 03:04 PMIts funny to hear you all talk about it, my daughter who is almost 11 in to her training bra. The discussion of thongs came up between my wife and i and she is against them, and i think she should be able to wear what she wants.
Whats the big deal with thongs anyways? its better than wearing nothing.... Right?
Thanks From a confused male.
Posted by: glenn at November 25, 2004 08:51 AMI hated it when my mum bought me my first bra for my 12th birthday. I refused to wear it for about 3 months, until finally she persuaded me that I needed something to stop my nipples showing through my pe shirt!
I haven't got a daughter myself, but my niece got my sister to buy her a training bra when she was a few months past her 10th birthday. Before that she wore a crop-top which she called her sports bra!
Posted by: Andrea at May 2, 2005 07:44 AM