We’ve got a film crew camped out all around us, shooting a something-or-other at the house behind us. The Notification of Filming the production company sent out describes the action as: “Interior, exterior dialogue. Driving scenes. Domestic fight scene. Police activity. Emergency vehicles with flashing lights. Cameras & equipment on sidewalk, in curblane & across street.” Sounds like, well, half the shows I worked on when I was in the business.

The dressing rooms and honeywagon are parked along the side of the backyard and the grip truck is right outside my bedroom window. Ah, memories. The grip truck. My home away from home in my film crew days. I’ve been out of production for six or seven years now but I still miss it sometimes. It was long, hard, brutal work sometimes, but it was also a lot of fun. If I were single I’d probably still be doing it.

So anyway, we’ve got film crew running around all over the place. I did a slow drive-by a little while ago to scope out the production and see if I knew anyone from back in the day but there were no familiar faces.

I have to admit to a little curiousity about just what they’re shooting, but there’s no way in hell I’m going to ask. That’s the thing about working on the set — there’s always a cordon of looky-loos watching every move, whispering among themselves, jostling for the best viewing positions, flagging down anyone who comes near to ask “What are you filming? Who’s in it? Where’s (star name)’s trailer?” Etc. They never get the truth, at least not from me.

“Diaper commercial” was my stock answer. We’d be resetting for a fight scene where a stuntman had just been thrown through the front window of a tattoo parlor and started brawling on the sidewalk, police cars and fire trucks all around with lights flashing, helicopter circling above, SWAT teams hunkered down behind parked cars … and some doughy tourist from Ohio would ask “Are you making a movie?” Nope, I’d say, diaper commercial. And then I’d get back to flying a mambo-combo, producer, and a 4-by floppy in to the set.

Sigh… I miss gripology.